After The Wedding – How To Argue With Your New Spouse

Your wedding ceremony was the celebration of your intention to join your future with that of your fiance, the love of your life. You survived the stress of wedding planning and enjoyed a beautiful and intimate honeymoon.

Now you are home and your life has changed dramatically while both of you adjust to the new meaning of your relationship. Jobs, bills and stresses will take its toll on the dream life you thought being married would provide. You might argue occasionally and by disturbed by that unexpected event in your new life.

One of the great marriage myths you might have believed before you got married was that two people as much in love as you and your spouse are will never argue or be angry with each other. But the healthiest of couples will argue at times and it is not a sign of your relationship breaking down.

If both of you can build a stable sense of trust in knowing that you will disagree with each other and argue at times, then you both will be able to release your feelings without feeling discarded or embarrassed.

You do have to realize, though, that differences of opinion and even loud arguments can be very hurtful if either one of you starts name-calling and painting the other with broad accusations. How you argue is far more important than how many times you argue or even what you argue about.

Following some guidelines will actually preserve your marriage and avoid causing emotional pain to your spouse.

When you argue, stick to the topic and do not escalate the argument by wandering off into other issues and eventually verbally attacking your partner. People commonly say things they regret during a heated argument and, once the damage is done, it is difficult to repair.

Keep your tone and physical stance calm and non-threatening during your argument. Aggressive anger can escalate in a minute and keeping your body loose and calm will reduce that danger. Clenching fists, yelling and stiffly marching around your partner while arguing is definitely threatening. Stay cool.

Some like conflict because it is emotionally stimulating. Do not fall into that trap and start arguments to feel and enjoy the stimulation. If your marriage needs more stimulation, discuss that and together figure out how to spice up your relationship.

During an argument, don’t use the situation as a dump for all the wrongs and misdeeds you can think of. Argue about one thing at a time. Don’t store up hurt feelings and misunderstandings and dump them on your partner when the original argument started about over one thing that could have been easily remedied.

Learn to forgive and forget. Neither one of you is perfect and you both probably have past missteps you might like to forget. Learn to think before you speak and to avoid spewing hurtful accusations at each other. Never, ever start any sentence with, “You always or you never…”

Relationships are fragile during hard times. Arguments can permanently damage any relationship with foolish accusations. Rather than letting an argument escalate beyond all repair, you might agree to disagree. Just because you married each other, it does not mean that you will see eye-to-eye on everything.

Accepting your differences and working out compromises will bring you both closer together.

Technorati Tags: wedding, spouse, wedding ceremony, marriage myths. married life, couples, relationships, Teri Champigny

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So, you’re expected to make a toast at your best friend’s wedding, but you don’t know what to say. Honoring the big day and the new couple without either embarrassing yourself and them or coming across dry and wooden can be pretty tricky. You’ll want to put some thought into what you’re going to say and do. Let’s take a look at a few ideas that can help you get started.

First, think about who you are going to be toasting. There are a few conventions in formal or traditional weddings you should be aware of. For instance, as the best man, you’ll be expected to toast the bride. You may be permitted to toast others as well, depending on how formal the wedding is, so pay attention to the circumstances and feel of the wedding.

Start by letting everyone know who you are and how you know the couple. Remember that some guests just won’t know who you are. It’s best to make this clear from the start to prevent confusion. Next, you’ll want to show gratitude to the hosts of the wedding, whether it’s the happy couple, their parents or someone else. Thank them for welcoming you to the occasion.

Most wedding toasts also have a bit of an anecdote, including how you met various parties or how they met, stories you want to tell their children some day, and important elements in your friendship. Don’t go for clichés if you can avoid it, and remember to think about the audience. It’s important to cater to the highest common denominator, if there is such a thing, and avoid offending anyone, especially the parents of the bride and groom.

Learn about the cultures involved in a wedding when more than one culture is involved, and avoid inside jokes or adult humor. Nudity, inappropriate behavior, and sex are all topics left out of most toasts, and you probably shouldn’t talk about politics or religion unless you’re really sure of the audience. If you’re not sure the story is appropriate, avoid it. It’s better to be safe than sorry if you’re the best man giving a toast. Another good rule of thumb is to go easy on the alcoholic beverages before you give the toast.

Remember to offer a compliment about the bride and anyone else you’re giving a toast to. Don’t go on and on about how wonderful they are, however. That could end up boring your audience, and no one wants that. Instead, use just a few adjectives to tell the audience what you think is best about him or her. In addition, remember to end your toast on a positive note. A traditional toast quote, a blessing, or good wishes are common choices. Remember to use your head and think in advance, and you’ll come up with a great wedding toast that everyone will appreciate.

Technorati Tags: best man, toasts, wedding, bride and groom, groom, wedding toasts, what to say

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Wedding planning isn’t just for the bride; the groom should take some responsibility and have some input in the process too. However, traditionally the arrangements are covered by the bride and her mother. That means that many people don’t know how to get the groom involved. Let’s take a look at a few ways to help him avoid feeling left out of things or run over by your plans.

If you’ve just gotten engaged, you’re going to want to make the announcement. Both of you can create an announcement card to send out by mail or email, or share the responsibility of calling friends and family. Together, make the list of people you’d like to invite to the wedding.

Food is another important portion of your wedding. Your fiancé can help you with the budget, help figure out the catering situation, and maybe come up with a few creative ideas that you haven’t thought of. If one or the other of you is a skilled negotiator, consider delegating that person to work with the vendors to get the best price. Remember, every task is an important one!

You may wish to write your vows together, too. Collaboration can help you come up with the perfect words to say to one another to express your love. Other things you can do together include building decorations for the reception, researching the music and deciding on the DJs, and choosing the videographer or photographer. You’ll want to talk about just what each of you wants out of the wedding.

For many grooms, the wine and other drinks that will be provided at the reception are extremely important. If this is something your guy cares about, or if he loves food, let him handle the food and drink. Resist the urge to micro manage! Each of you has the ability to put together something great without supervision, as long as you’re clear on what needs to be done in advance.

Other things the groom can do to take a little bit of the load off the bride’s shoulders include choosing suits for the wedding, contributing his opinion on colors, theme, and size of the wedding, and choosing the transportation for the big day. He can also handle wedding present registrations and handle mediation with your families if there are problems. He can even talk about the toast with the best man if you’re feeling nervous about it.

It’s a great idea to involve your groom in the wedding planning. Just make sure to include him in the decision making as well as the labor, and relax about his ability to handle things. He can get the job done just as well as you can, and it’ll keep you from feeling quite as stressed and unhappy. If you’ll be married soon, you’re going to be entering a life where you do a lot of things together. Planning your ceremony and reception is a great start.

Technorati Tags: wedding planning, bride, mother of the bride, groom, reception, wedding, ceremony, planning, fiancé

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The traditional church weddings and formal receptions are not that attractive to many of today’s brides. Weddings are taking place in hot air balloons, on beaches, in airplanes and in fast food parking lots, to name a few currently popular non-traditional sites.

An emerging trend, highly creative wedding receptions, is a total flight from tradition and will make memories for your wedding guests that they won’t easily forget. You and your new spouse can add touches to your wedding reception that highlight your whimsical side, major interests or elements of your personalities.

Some couples have hosted two receptions, brunch for the family following their ceremony, with some of the traditional aspects their mothers wanted and the relatives were comfortable with.

Later that evening, they host a less formal reception for their friends. This reception could be an old-fashioned ice cream social or a barbecue on the beach, with youthful music and a party atmosphere. The bride’s wedding dress and the groom’s tux are abandoned for casual attire. Friends truly happy for the new couple, a relaxed, unfussy atmosphere, a tub of iced cool ones, chicken on the barbecue and dancing barefoot on the beach in the moonlight, would definitely make memories of your special wedding.

Even if you want a reception with familiar trappings, you can still jazz it up with some creative presentations.

If your reception hall is not huge, inflate balloons, with a small, light favor inside them. This favor could be a small token, like a map to the real favors hidden in the hall or a small snapshot of you and your new spouse. It does not have to be elaborate. The appreciation would be in the presentation.

Tie them off with a ribbon long enough to reach without ladders and have a guest’s name hanging from each ribbon, including the children at the reception. Let them hang from the ceiling around the walls, so as not to interfere with the meal or buffet you will be serving. This decoration would not only be colorful, but it would give your reception an intimate, closer feeling. At some point, have the guests find their name and get their wedding favor.

The way you present your food can add dramatic accents to plain food. Buffet tables are perfect for creative presentations. Tiered plates of strawberries dipped in chocolate are always an attraction at buffet tables. Consider dipping the strawberries in the hot chocolate mixture and letting them set up on a chocolate spoon. The dramatic effect could be enhanced by dipping the berries in white chocolate and then placing them on chocolate spoons. Other fruits can be strung on a bamboo skewer, dipped in chocolate and presented in silver goblets.

Martini glasses with their stems wrapped with pretty ribbons can be used to present almost any vegetable, fruit or candy. Instead of sit-down dinners of chicken or meat, served by caterers, consider bamboo skewers loaded with anything you can combine that doesn’t need to be kept warm in a sauce.

Try ice-cold shrimp, lightly brushed with a shrimp marinade and strung on a skewer. Separate the shrimp with red or black grapes. Creative salads can be put on a skewer and marinated with an elegant dressing before placing on the buffet table. Load salad skewers with cherry or grape tomatoes, chunks of red, green and yellow Bell peppers, whole, pitted olives, cocktail onions or slices of red onions, other veggies of your choice.

If your guest list is smaller, consider a river cruise with dinner, dancing and maybe a turn at the gambling tables, if they have them. Your wedding favors could be small bags of chips for your guests to try their luck at the tables.

You could schedule a hay ride by moonlight, with a surprise barbecue or candle-lit buffet tables arranged around a fire pit at the end of the ride. Be creative.

Instead of an organized wedding reception, you might try having a mystery party, like Clue. Some cities have Victorian houses you can rent for parties and events. Let your guests have some fun discovering “Who Dunnit.” Have a special prize for the one who unravels the mystery and smaller ones (themed favors) for the rest of the participants. In one room have a buffet table and a few bottles of wine.

There’s no reason to follow the old traditions with your reception if you don’t want to. Make it fun and memorable in your own way.

Technorati Tags: church weddings, creative wedding receptions, ceremony, formal reception, couples, reception hall

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Indeed, modern brides are truly lucky because today, weddings—no matter how unconventional are they—are socially accepted. One of the most popular themed weddings today is the beach wedding. And because of this popularity, more and more designers and bridal shops are offering a wide array of beach wedding dresses that brides—as well as grooms—can choose from.

What you need to know about beach wedding dresses:

Because of the popularity of beach weddings, beach wedding dresses have occupied a large number of racks in various bridal salons and stores. If you are one of those brides that are considering a beach wedding for her big day, you must familiarize yourself with everything about it first.

Usually, couples that are beach bums are the only ones who prefer beach wedding. This is because they would like the beach to be a special part of their union just like what it was during their dating stage. But today, even those who are not really into beach life can opt for this type of wedding if they want to. All they need to do is plan everything out carefully.

In a beach wedding, the major consideration is the venue or the beach itself. Since you will be inviting guests, it will be wiser to choose a nearby beach to save you and your guests from hassle in getting to the place. Also, it is best to choose a beach in a tropical country because the climate is warmer and better all throughout the year.

For brides, the next major consideration would be the attire. Here comes a variety of beach wedding dresses to choose from. In choosing beach wedding dresses, keep in mind that they should not be formal since the celebration itself has a casual mood. There is no need for full and formal skirts or elaborate headpieces. What is called for in this occasion are and sleek style—perfect for a beach backdrop. Ideal beach wedding dresses are those that have simple yet classes and elegant design. Here, minimalist look will work best since there is no need to over accessorize.

If you look in various bridal shops that offer beach wedding dresses, the staple designs would be strapless or tube, sleeveless, and halter. These beach wedding dresses are designed that way not only to show off the nice figure of the bride but also to give her utmost comfort during the rites. Most beach wedding dresses come in these styles but there are also variations in terms of length and body type of the bride.

When it comes to accessories, beach wedding dresses require very minimal and casual ones. In fact, compared to the gowns worn on traditional church weddings, beach wedding dresses don’t even require a veil. Since the overall feel of the theme is casual, you can choose dainty accessories such as a ring of flowers and use it as a hair band or barrettes that match your beach wedding dress and your other accessories.

For the hair, easygoing styles such as simple ponytail would do. For the footwear, there is also no need to wear high heels since it doesn’t match the dress and the location. Opt for dainty pair of flip-flops or sandals with soft and intricate straps. If you truly want an authentic feel of the beach, you can go barefoot. Just make sure that there are no stones in the sand so you won’t hurt your foot as you go your way.

Technorati Tags: beach wedding dresses, wedding dresses, beaches, bridal shops, accessories, footwear, tropical beaches

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Now that you have shared your happy news with family and friends the fun really starts. It’s time to actually start planning your wedding; wedding reception ideas, bridal bouquets, wedding favor ideas and dress ideas will be swimming around in that little loved-up head of yours!

Take a deep breath and relax because the BIG question you’re already asking yourself is… “Where do I start?”

Well, the only way to successfully plan your perfect wedding is to start with your wedding reception ideas. Treat yourself to a few bridal magazines [you've always wanted to buy one and now you can with that rock on your finger!]. Start looking around in haberdashery departments and put together a collection of the materials, styles and colors that appeal to you. These will provide the essential ingredients for your wedding reception ideas board or scrapbook or however you choose to present them.

Your ideas can then spiral off in a multitude of different directions as you start to consider wedding themes, wedding favor ideas, color themes and style themes, etc. It is truly essential to set the tone of your wedding first and then everything else falls in to place. For example, if your bridal gown shop knows you are going for a traditional “ivory and gold” theme, she can then advise you on gowns to suit this theme. In addition, you can then advise your wedding favor supplier that any ideas for wedding favors must fit within this theme.

Wedding favors come in all different styles and design. They range from candle favors, chocolate favors, cd wedding favors, beach themed favors and many more. You can even personalize your favors to make them unique to your guests.

In these early days, there is no need to ask for the groom’s comments – wait until you have narrowed down some ideas before you present them to him. He won’t really respond to “do you like this?” and “what about this?” being thrown at him 50 times a day. It is far better to approach your groom once you have narrowed down groomsmen ideas, color ideas, wedding reception ideas, wedding favor ideas, etc to a minimum. You will also get a more honest answer from him. Don’t forget, even though ideas for wedding favors have completely taken over your life for the moment, he might not share your enthusiasm at this early stage of the preparations.

Throughout your ideas stage, you must not forget your wedding guests. Fundamentally, it is your day, however every girl wants their wedding remembered for its class and elegance. The one way that guests will treasure your wedding memories is by the giving of unique wedding favors. Second to your wedding themes and wedding reception ideas, you must consider wedding favor ideas carefully. Once your beautiful day is over and you’re embarking on married life, you want your guests to look back at their favor boxes and bomboniere and reminisce!

However you plan your wonderful day, and whichever of your original wedding reception ideas and ideas for wedding favors you choose, have a special day and a magical married life thereafter!

Technorati Tags: marriage, married, wedding, wedding reception, bridal magazines, wedding favors, bride, groom, planning

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(Sugared Almonds Wedding Favors)

Your wedding reception should be the party of your life and when planning it, every effort should be made in order to ensure that’s what you get. Table decorations, floral arrangements, venue, entertainment and bomboniere are key to a successful wedding reception.

When it comes to the venue, it needs to suit the theme of your wedding. For example, if your bridal gown were princess-like, a castle would be suitable. Alternatively, you may have a simple floor length shift-shape dress and to be in keeping with your look, the venue may be a modern riverside restaurant. Whichever theme you choose, even the smallest detail must be meticulously well planned and this includes your choice of bomboniere.

Originally, brides were supposed to make up favors or bomboniere by hand, but in the busy lives we now lead, this is near on impossible. Bomboniere consist of round shaped colored nets tied together with coordinating ribbons and finished with dried flowers or beads. These pretty nets are filled with a dish of delicious dragees [tear-shaped sugar coated chocolates in various colors] or sumptuous almonds [sugar coated tear-shaped nuts available in a range of colors].

Each dragee or almond is said to represent one of the five common wedding wishes; fertility, health, happiness, longevity and wealth. By giving them to your guests, the bride and groom are said to have a marriage filled with all these things. Nowadays of course, many brides are turning away from traditional almond or dragee bomboniere and are choosing more modern ways to thank their guests. Although there are a huge range of inedible favors such as candle favors, flower seed wedding favors and ornament wedding favors, there is nothing more beautiful than leaving a wedding reception with a hand-tied net pouch filled with almonds or dragees. Despite popular belief, the traditional bomboniere can still be very much a part of a modern wedding. There are so many options when it comes to bomboniere, that the world is quite literally your oyster.

For example, natural color theme weddings are very much en vogue with brides choosing simple, clean cut dresses for themselves and taupe, pale green or ivory 50’s style dresses for their bridesmaids. Floral arrangements reflect the simplicity of the wedding as brides opt for small hand-tied white bouquets or a drape of plain orchids across their arms. Traditional bomboniere can fit beautifully in these more retro occasions as brides can select ivory or white nets, fill them with white almonds and finish them with a pale green bow. Alternatively, ecru colored nets can be complemented with ivory or gold dragees and finished off with coordinating ribbons or flowers.

So, whatever your wedding venue, dress or bouquet, there is a bomboniere to suit all occasions. Your choice of bomboniere should reflect your theme and personality and with such a vast range of nets, almonds, dragees, colors, flowers and ribbons, no two bomboniere need be the same!

Technorati Tags: bomboniere, Italian wedding favors, sugared almonds, dragees, wedding favors

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Unless a couple is eloping in Las Vegas by themselves, a wedding should have some unique planning and twists to it in order to make the wedding memorable. Inventing a winter wedding theme is one such concept, and in order to properly design a winter wedding, a few simple ideas could be put forth.

1. Probably the easiest winter wedding idea is also one of the simplest, which is providing simple twists on common wedding conventions. For example, the wedding cake could be made in the shape of a snowman or a snowflake. While this is not the most elaborate of ideas, providing simple twists on common conventions is sometimes all that is required to present the appearance of a novel idea.

2. The wedding attire of the bride, groom, and bridesmaids can also be designed so as to embody the theme of winter. This is another winter wedding idea that can be easily put in motion so as to create a wonderful winter wedding theme. The use of silver, white, and blue colored formal wear can provide an excellent evocation of winter and is highly suggested for those planning a wedding that is to follow a winter theme.

3. Selecting the food for the wedding should involve selecting food that closely follows a winter theme. This would involve “hot” items such as hot chocolate and “cold” items such as eggnog. There does need to be a bit of careful planning involved, as one should not cross the line into territory where the wedding theme becomes murky and a Christmas or holiday theme becomes too pronounced.

4. The decor of the wedding should also follow themes that are consistent with the winter. This does not mean that the decor should embody specific winter conventions, but should at least emanate a certain color scheme that is more closely associated with winter than anything else. That would mean using colors such as silver, light blue, white, etc. To use other colors not associated with winter would distract away from the theme and undermine the idea of having a winter wedding and turning the entire wedding into a generic theme instead.

5. For the actual wedding itself, sometimes the theme can be proactive as opposed to being passive. One of the biggest myths about weddings is that they are passive and dull events. Well, the reality of the matter is that a wedding can be boring and dull. There have been some enterprising individuals who can put a unique, active spin on the traditional wedding. For example, there have been those fun minded individuals who will have their weddings performed underwater in scuba gear or even falling to earth while skydiving! Now, for winter loving people, a wedding at a skiing or snowboarding resort can provide the same theme of active fun to coincide with the wedding, while remaining much more sane than holding the wedding underwater!

Ultimately, having a winter wedding is simply taking traditional wedding ideas and putting a minor winter spin on them.

Technorati Tags: winter weddings, winter theme, planning winter wedding, winter wedding dresses

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Celebrating the unity of two people for eternity is the foremost purpose of a Wedding Ceremony. It has been this way and will continue to be this way for as long as the tradition lives. Wedding Guests are invited to share not only in the joyous occasion but also to bear witness to the union. There is something spiritual about standing before all those who are special to you and make a lifelong commitment to someone for others to hear, which is what really transforms two people into a married couple.

To show an appreciation for their guests, for the time they have taken out of their busy lives to be part of the Wedding, the bride and groom shower their guests with Wedding Favors. These Wedding Gifts or Wedding Favors have been the tradition to thank the wedding guests for their thoughtfulness, their gifts and help in any way given to the couple in making the wedding a special occasion.

Wedding favors traditionally are given to all of the guests that have been invited to the wedding reception, of course, more expensive wedding favors are available and there are many weddings for which these higher-priced wedding favors are appropriate. These are typically inexpensive gifts, averaging in the $1 – $2 price range. Numerous wedding favors are available in just about any category one could imagine, from sterling silver picture frames, to personalized edible chocolates, and even fragrant bath soaps.

Selecting wedding favors is not that difficult at all, nor is it necessary to purchase these well in advance of the wedding date. Most are readily available at online and retail outlets that specialize in these kind of wedding accessories. You don’t want to wait until the last minute however, as that is a particularly hectic time. You will need to allow ample time for personalization, or if you select an item that requires special ordering, for example, an unusually large quantity, or an exclusive item.

To be on the safe side, two to three months prior to the wedding date is a good time to make your wedding favor selections. Once you have them in your possession, the only other thing you need to worry about is getting them to the reception before the guests arrive and presenting them in a unique and beautiful manner appropriate for the occasion

Online shopping has made finding appropriate wedding favors very easy. Type ‘wedding favors’ into your search engine and you’ll get pages of web sites offering every type of wedding favor you could ever want. So where do you begin? It’s definitely a good idea to consult your budget worksheet first so you know the price range to focus on.

From there, think about what makes you and your partner unique. Do you both love golf? Are you wine connoisseurs? What about a theme? If your wedding has one, there’s sure to be a favor to complement that theme. Do you want the favor to be the place holder? If so, select one that allows you to write the person’s name and table number. Creating your own wedding favors is another option and can end up being the most unique wedding favor of all and one that your guests are sure to treasure!

Wedding Favors most suited to the occasion are the ones that reflect your personal style and personality. So select something that you personally enjoy and that your guests will appreciate and remember your wedding and you for a long time to come.

Technorati Tags: wedding favors, wedding ceremony, wedding guests, gifts, favors, bride, groom

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What makes a great bachelorette party?  Some girls say it is going out to bars, flirting with guys, and drinking shots all night long.  Other girls, especially slightly older brides, find that they aren’t looking for a situation that will only make them feel uncomfortable.

If you are planning a bachelorette party for a more reserved friend, or a girl who doesn’t drink, how do you still make sure she has a fun event?  Are there rules for planning a bachelorette party?

First, there are no set rules for bachelorette party planning.  There are, however, several key elements that make a bachelorette party a success.  The first step is to determine the expectations of the bride.  Does she want to stay in?  Does she want to invite twenty girls, or only six?  Does she have a restaurant she wants to visit, a concert she’d like to go to, or would she prefer an at home gathering?

Knowing the wishes of the bride is a key step to begin your planning.  If you have determined that the bride wants a less wild, simpler bachelorette party, you have many options to make sure it is still memorable. 

First, be sure to include the right guests – girls that the bride feels closest to. Next, think about a theme for your party.  Does the bachelorette love chocolate?  Maybe you can have a chocolate party with chocolate fountains and goodies, and gift bags for all the guests that are a rich, brown color, filled with chocolate gifts.  Or, try a theme centered on the groom, such as a “girly” football party for a girl who is marrying a huge football fan.  This party can include all the guests wearing football gear like jerseys and the food being a tailgate style.  No matter what theme you choose, make sure that it fits the bride, and your bachelorette party will be more successful.

Another key to an at-home party is making sure there are no men allowed!  Send your boyfriend or husband out for the night to make sure you have the house to yourself.  Or, ideally, plan the bachelorette party for the same night as the bachelor party when the guys are busy themselves. Next, plan great food.  A bachelorette party should feel indulgent, so make sure you are providing good snacks, or to keep costs down, make it a potluck party.  Have each girl bring a favorite dish and you can all get together, snack, and play bachelorette party games!

Finally, remember to focus entirely on the bride.  Have the girls each share a special story about a funny moment with the bride, or to write down their favorite memory of her.  Then, take turns reading the memories and have the bride guess who wrote what.  It is a good bonding experience and reminds everyone why they love the bride and lets guests who don’t know each other well get to know each other better before the wedding.

Whatever you do for your bachelorette party, remember that the key to a great party is the love you put into it and the friends you have gathered.

More on another site for brides from Teri Champigny
http://bridalaccessories1.info

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